Sometimes I wish I had my brother’s carefree attitude… The one that tells him not to worry about anything because it’s all going to work out just fine – so he doesn’t and things do.
Not me.
I am a worry machine. I read books that tell me to stop stressing about things I can’t possibly predict or control, and then I worry about not stressing… It’s ridiculous.
So of course the machine starts up again when I return to LA after a much appreciated sojourn with the parents and realize just how long I’ve (already) put off my current job hunt by staying home as long as I did. Obviously I needed it. And I wouldn’t have shortened it if you paid me… okay, well, maybe if you paid me. But it was wonderful and I’m so happy I went, only here I am now with a tad bit of panic.
Which has me wondering just how it is that my brother and I can be so very diferent in so many ways – chief among them my tendancy to try to anticipate everything and his ability to just take it as it comes.
Maybe it’s time for the big sister to take a lesson from lil’ bro… because most of the time everything is alright, right now. Worrying about it isn’t going to do anything for me. It’s just a big hairy monster that feeds on itself and makes me feel crappy. So let’s try not to worry!
I will find a job. I will find a job. I will find a job that pays well and doesn’t drive me crazy… I will!
